A New Breed of Human Being, The Celebutante

Paris Hilton has a date for January 17th. She won't be partying her life away like all her other dates. She has been charged with slander and harassment by another celebutante, Zeta Graff.

Graff stated that Hilton tried to choke her, verbally threatened her life (as if the choking wasn't a clue) and tried to tear a diamond necklace off her neck.

It is also aledged that Hilton made false statements to the New York Post about Graff in a story that was published last summer.

Graff is also accusing Hilton of perjuring herself while testifying at a deposition. She is seeking damages of $10 million.

Okay, now that the serious stuff is over...let us talk as if these were two normal people. Wait, they're not normal. They live in a world that doesn't exist.

Slander. If the jury finds Hilton guilty of slander they could charge her father to pay more money to Graff. Harassment is the same, more money.

Perjury is different. You could serve jail time for that. Up to 20 years if convicted. We'd love to see Paris in that bright orange, non flattering, California prison issue jumpsuit but we all know that isn't going to happen.

I think it's unfair for millions of dollars to be changing hands because Hilton is a less than steller human being. If I sued my sister for every time she said, "I'm gonna kill you," I'd be tied up in court for the rest of my immortal life.

(Soapbox, gone)

We all wish Paris a happy and speedy recovery from her eating disorder and drug use.